Behold: A stupid person

Ed at Hotair brings us the heartwarming tale of a child who was born prematurely and had to leave the country to avoid death. A blogger reporting on the news has said one of the most unintentionally hilarious things I've heard in a while:

I won’t get into the relative merits of the American and Canadian health-care systems here. Suffice it to say that there obviously need to be more neo-natal intensive care unit beds up here. Thankfully — and this doesn’t mean that the American system is better (after all, at least the couple and their baby are guaranteed care up here, thanks to our public system, even if it’s not perfect) — there was an opening south of the border.

Really, a couple and child are guaranteed are up there? Precisely what care did you receive in Canada? If you didn't happen to live a few hours away from a country with some of the best healthcare on earth, your kid would be dead right now. You didn't receive any of this care that you were 'guaranteed' in Canada, you had to come to the good 'ole USA. I struggle to chose an appropriate analogy, so take your pick:

1. All Canada sold you was a guaranteed piece of shit. That's all it is, isn't it? Hey, if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed, I will. I got spare time.

2.
Canada: I'm sorry, we have no neo-natal intensive care beds available at the moment.

Father: I don't understand, you guaranteed healthcare.

Canada: Yes, we do, unfortunately we ran out of beds.

Father: But the guarantee keeps the bed here. That's why you have the
guarantee.

Canada: I know why we have guarantees.

Father: I don't think you do. If you did, my son would have a bed. See, you know how to
make a guarantee, you just don't know how to *hold* the bed and
that's really the most important part of the guarantee, the holding. Anybody
can just make them.

Ok, so that second one didn't turn out so well. The point is: You don't have guaranteed care! If you did, you wouldn't have had to leave the country! I see that Canada's public education system is apparently no better than our own. (And I say this as a product of the Canadian public school system. That's right I went there for all of kindergarten, where they tried to teach me the despicable lie that the letter 'z' is pronounced 'zed'.)