Keep them away from the pointy objects

Allah has once again linked to a story relating to the Great Obama Birth-Certificate Conspiracy, and this has inevitably led to another flood of hundreds of heated comments on both sides of the "issue". This fucking shit has to end. Now.

What the fuck is wrong with these morons (and I mean that in the derogatory fashion)? First, what fucking difference is it going to make? Ok so fine, let's indulge in your delusional fantasy: It is proven that Obama was not born in Hawaii, then what? First, the law has been for years that a person born to a mother who is a US citizen is automatically a US citizen, ergo Obama would still be a 'Natural Born US Citizen'.

Oh, you don't wan't to obey previous case law, fine, let's go a step further. Who defines what it means to be a 'Natural Born Citizen'? That's right, fuckstick, the Congress. So all that congress would have to do is clarify that being born to a US citizen automatically makes you a 'Natural Born Citizen'; problem solved.

Oh, that is still not good enough for you shit heads? Fine, let's indulge your ultimate goal, Congress declares Obama to not be the President anymore, who will be the President? I don't fucking know, but it wouldn't be a god damned Republican! Let's go down the line of succession, shall we? The most likely replacement is Joe Biden. Joe Biden! That's a lot fucking better, now isn't it? Ok, so maybe Biden isn't the legitimate President because he was elected under an ineligible President. Who's next? Nancy fucking Pelosi. Fantastic. Thanks guys, you really saved us from that bastard Obama.

You are hurting our side with your inane insanity. Does this make people more willing to believe in fiscal conservatism? No. Does this persuade people to advocate judicial restraint? Fucking NO! You are worse than the god damned Truthers.

And now is the time where I indulge in my own little form off conspiracy theory. I like to think I have a logical and rational political philosophy. It disturbs me to see people who allegedly share this philosophy acting like a bunch of tin-foil hat wearing nut-jobs. I'm not entirely convinced that a lot of the people egging this on aren't Leftists who are trying to make us look nuts. If that's the case, good job you dipshits, you've taken the bait. Next time you feel the need to indulge in paranoid delusions, remember what Admiral Ackbar said: "It's a trap!"

Behold: A stupid person

Ed at Hotair brings us the heartwarming tale of a child who was born prematurely and had to leave the country to avoid death. A blogger reporting on the news has said one of the most unintentionally hilarious things I've heard in a while:

I won’t get into the relative merits of the American and Canadian health-care systems here. Suffice it to say that there obviously need to be more neo-natal intensive care unit beds up here. Thankfully — and this doesn’t mean that the American system is better (after all, at least the couple and their baby are guaranteed care up here, thanks to our public system, even if it’s not perfect) — there was an opening south of the border.

Really, a couple and child are guaranteed are up there? Precisely what care did you receive in Canada? If you didn't happen to live a few hours away from a country with some of the best healthcare on earth, your kid would be dead right now. You didn't receive any of this care that you were 'guaranteed' in Canada, you had to come to the good 'ole USA. I struggle to chose an appropriate analogy, so take your pick:

1. All Canada sold you was a guaranteed piece of shit. That's all it is, isn't it? Hey, if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed, I will. I got spare time.

2.
Canada: I'm sorry, we have no neo-natal intensive care beds available at the moment.

Father: I don't understand, you guaranteed healthcare.

Canada: Yes, we do, unfortunately we ran out of beds.

Father: But the guarantee keeps the bed here. That's why you have the
guarantee.

Canada: I know why we have guarantees.

Father: I don't think you do. If you did, my son would have a bed. See, you know how to
make a guarantee, you just don't know how to *hold* the bed and
that's really the most important part of the guarantee, the holding. Anybody
can just make them.

Ok, so that second one didn't turn out so well. The point is: You don't have guaranteed care! If you did, you wouldn't have had to leave the country! I see that Canada's public education system is apparently no better than our own. (And I say this as a product of the Canadian public school system. That's right I went there for all of kindergarten, where they tried to teach me the despicable lie that the letter 'z' is pronounced 'zed'.)

Well, would you look at that

It seems that someone has read this blog, because not two days after I posted the Reagan video where does it show up? That's right Moonbattery. I would just like to say: Ok you motherfuckers, who is reading this blog and passing on what you read here without attribution!?

I know someone is. This is the most influential blog on the internet that no one knows exists. First I post the "this is where we fight!" clip and suddenly bloggers and politicos manage to find a spine. Then I post the Reagan video - which has been on YouTube forever, very unlikely that someone discovered it at the same time I did - and it shows up on a blog that I link too.

I'm not mad, I am happy to see my ideas getting pushed even if I don't get credit for them. But seriously, this can't be a coincidence. Not cool, man. Not cool.

Update: And look, someone else has viciously stolen from me.

What he said

As long as there has been Socialism there have been Statists and Socialists to promote its spread in America, from perennial loser Eugene V. Debs to the momentarily successful Barack Obama. The Statists have been pushing for Socialized medicine for well over half a century, and they are as close to getting it implemented as they ever have been. They can't be bargained with. They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And they absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.

In order to prevent the catastrophic intrusion to our liberty that they desire, we must be vigilant. We must argue. We must show how Obama's "public option" is nothing of the sort. It is nothing but a blatant foot in the door in an attempt to open the flood gates to full blown socialized medicine. We can't let that happen. This is the most articulate, impassioned, and informed speech I have heard on the topic. Sadly, it is 48 years old:

Finally, they tackle the important issues

Have you ever been watching TV when the commercial comes on and the volume is so high that you have to cover your ears to avoid permanent hearing damage? Apparently you're not alone, as Congress has taken a break from impoverishing us and our posterity for a day to focus on something much more important: making sure that commercials aren't too loud.

"Every time the ads came on they blew me out of my seat," said Rep. Anna Eshoo, D-Calif., who introduced the bill last June. "It really turns you off, makes you think, 'I'll be damned if I give them any of my money.' "

Apparently she is not aware that individuals can actually make the same choice, voting with their dollars to not buy from a company that causes ear damage with their loud commercials. No, she would rather induce the companies to have the correct volume with all the force of the US Congress. Frankly I was unaware that the congress had the power to regulate the volume at which privately held companies not engaging in interstate commerce broadcast the commercials that allow them to stay on the air. You learn something new every day.

I should make an impassioned plea to let the free market dictate how loud commercials should be. I should assail the ever expanding influence of the nanny state on the minutia of our lives. I should, but I wont, because any time they spend on silly shit like this is time they can't spend screwing us with universal healthcare, cap and trade, and whatever other idiocies the Moonbat Messiah has in store for us.

A rational and mature discussion of ideas

I have decided to come out of the closet

In a manner of speaking. I will now become slightly less anonymous. I shall from this day forth be known as Jeff M. Which is my real name. At least 1/3 of it anyway. How many people with the name Jeff M could there be?

Of course

Arthur Kade has a Twitter account. And who is he following?: Barack Obama. Of course, it is part of the universal law of douchebag attraction.

Why are smart people so dumb?

I was thinking this, but I wasn't planning on writing it. However, the exponential increase in traffic has convinced me to do so.

How is it that me, a stupid kid, in college, not even studying poly-sci, was able to see through Obama's lies back in January of 2007; but highly paid, highly educated politicos such as David Brooks, Peggy Noonan, Kathlene Parker, the entire staff of The Economist, Colin Powell , Christopher Buckley, and well, the entire MSM, were not? (diagram that sentence)

Oh, and that reminds me

Boom. LGF, you're off the blogroll. Try not to take it too hard.